Many people ask me how to deal with ego; it begins with understanding it. To put it very simply, ego is the illusion of self. It creates a certain kind of prejudice, bias or knowledge about ourselves that might be false. If we are stuck in our ego, we are stuck in that image that we created, whether we attach it to our appearance, birthright, knowledge, wealth, or status. So, we see ourselves above others. For example, if we confront somebody who may have invaluable knowledge to share but is already stuck in the illusion of “I already know it, and I know it best,.” It makes your glass full. There is no space left to fill. That is when we get stuck in that illusion. We don’t live in the reality. That’s when ego transforms the way we see things. It doesn’t help us to see what’s the reality.

So, how can we let go of our ego? Some tips can help us to become less self-centered about ourselves;

There is a saying which goes, “Fools talk, cowards are silent, wise men listen.” Whenever we are in some places, we start to become a listener because if we want to be the one who talks all the time, it helps our ego rise, rise, and rise.

When we settle down, be calm, start taking the information, observe, and listen to the people talking. It helps us to become less self-centered. We open our minds to try to hear what other people are talking about and what they have to share.

It is easy for us to see the wrong things in people. They talk too much, they are unshareable, they are not responsible, or they follow their duties. It is straightforward for us to see that, but one thing we never see is ourselves. That is why it is always easy for us to find the wrong things in people but never the bad things in us. If we transform the way we think and try to look at the positive aspects of everyone, “that person is so kind, or that person is so nice” in different parts. That way, we have certain things to appreciate about the person, leading to number 3.

Try to be humble everywhere you go; that way, you automatically allow yourself to become less self-centered. The moment you try to spot the positive things in others and express humility towards others. You are not going to be the glass full of water anymore. You will give yourself a chance to hear what people have to say and appreciate other people around you, which leads to numbers.

This is significantly related to the previous point. When you become very respectful towards the person, you try to look up to the person as a role model or something good about it that you can look up to instead of looking down on the person and living in your illusions of being better than others. So, showing respect and being respectful towards other people, places, or even situations helps you to kill that ego out of your mind.

When people become grateful for something, they become appreciative of it. And they want to repay the gratitude. In that way, it transforms that sense of appreciation into action.

So, these are the five rules that can help us let go of our ego. Be a listener. Look for positivity. Be humble. Be respectful. Be grateful. Do it one step at a time. It takes time but is achievable. In that way, we let go of our illusions and live in reality.